My honey and I had the honor of privately renewing our vows this past weekend. A lot of people come to me wondering why they may consider renewing their vows and/ or why photography coverage is a good idea. A lot of ladies also seem to wonder how to get their husbands to do this with them or how big of an event it should be. Here are my answers to these questions as well as a list of my top 8 reasons to renew your wedding vows.
Trap them! No I am totally kidding, although it may seem to be what I did. I was lucky enough to be able to take advantage of leap day, which happened to be only 9 days before our anniversary. My husband did already know this was important to me though so while he was surprised to come home to a full proposal, he was not totally blindsided.
The real answer is to communicate. Let them know why it matters to you or even what cutesy things you want to do. What gives you butterflies about the whole thing? Once they hear these things they are likely to get on board with you. My husband even asked if we could this every year in some form after we had completed our day!
Other than the simple answer of capturing the memories the reality is that these may be calmer more simple memories than your initial big day. If there is no cocktail hour to rush off to we may be able to take more quiet time with just the two of you feeling really natural. If you are in a different season of life with children it is also a special time to include them. Some couples even bring along fur babies who have joined their family or were not included in their big day.
I’m sorry if you’re singing now. If you choose to do a renewal alone, with select family members or even with a big group the stress should still be far less than the original ceremony. If you are alone you of course have nothing to fear. If you’re in a large group you still have this. You have done this before! Anyone who will come out to see you recommit to each other is certainly a huge supporter in your life and you should feel comfortable in their presence.
Maybe you are waiting years and you have both changed a lot. Maybe only a year has gone by and you have changed in minor ways. You may have a growing family, altered responsibilities or roles. You may have learned to handle conflict better or you are proud to be past newly wed hiccups and tensions. In any case change is growth and it should be celebrated. You are never going to look back over decades and say you are the same exact people that you used to be. If you are growing together you are on the right path and you should be proud of yourselves and one another.
Along the path of change there may be vows you a see as being important now that you did not even think of when you first walked down the aisle. This is the perfect time to ad them in.
Do you thank your partner for special vows they have kept? Sometimes it is nice to hear! It may be the every day stuff or it could be really big things that you know were hard sometimes. When for better or for worse has been honored it should be pointed out with a grateful heart.
If you have broken a vow or haven’t given a vow as much attention as you should have it is important to recognize this. In any case if you have worked on your marriage together or intend to put a plan together at this time, you are on the right track. Making sure your partner knows where forgiveness has been thankfully given or where you would like to give it is important. Showing gratitude for forgiveness is also important.
Sure maybe your wedding gown or his tux wont happen, but there are likely to be smaller details from your big day that you can showcase at a renewal. Timeless brides can even pull out their bouquet again! (timelessbridalcreations.com)
Maybe you have a growing or newly completed family. Maybe you are proud to have aged gracefully together. Your family may even be growing again with grand-kids. All of these changes make for new reasons to celebrate the longevity of your love.
Whether your got married locally or had a destination wedding, fulfilling dreams of the opposite can be so much fun! (more on this later I promise)
Stay tuned!
Photo Credit : Bob Daniels, ARI second shooter.